Is That a Fact?
by Titania Le Fey
Summary: Snake getting in a bit of trouble at a strip club.


The bar was full tonight. Snake was watching his girls work the stage, work the crowd. He was on duty. Sam was the first to come over and he smiled at her when she wiped the sweat from her forehead.

"You look damned good up there." Snake commented as he took a drink.

"Yeah so would you."

Plissken grinned as he took a drag from his cigarette. "Why don't you go put something on for me?"

"Oh come on Plissken." She rolled her eyes at him. "We both know you won't get up there and dance."

"That a fact?" He asked crushing out his cigarette in the ashtray.

"That's a fact." She responded.

His grin spread as he slid off the bar stool. "You better go put something on and break out the bills. No, bullshit ones either. I expect tips like I give."

She was in shock as he walked passed and gave her a crack on the ass. He was headed for the stage. What could it hurt? Plissken sure wasn't one for modesty and where better to watch the crowd from then above them? The music started when he climbed the side stage steps.

All the girls were out in front of the stage. It was one hell of a view. Snake strutted right out to the edge of the stage in front of them. He tossed his jacket aside and the all started clapping. Plissken stared down at the girls for a second before sliding down into the splits right at the edge of the stage. They all screamed as his legs spread. Snake leaned forward and unsnapped his holsters. Smooth as the serpent he was named for he slid hands free up from the splits twirling his guns.

He couldn't help but laugh with them. It was silly as hell for him to be up here. Plissken glanced over the bar as he holstered the guns. The song was almost as absurd but he knew it well. A lot of the girls danced to it.

_I slam the door (BOOM)_

Snake ripped his shirt off and threw it in Sam's face. Laura was up waving greenbacks at the edge of the stage.

_When I come into the bedroom (Wham! Bam!)  
'Cause I'm the King of the castle (na na na)_

Snake swaggered as he walked over to her. Stepping wide he bent from the waist with a huge grin that made her flush red. She kept on waving it and Snake snatched it from her hands with his teeth. The girls cheered as he stepped back tucking the bills in beside his gun.

"Show us that ass!" Sam cried out over the screaming.

Snake checked out the bar as he turned back to the crowd.

"Bend over bad boy!"

Snake was laughing so hard it almost hurt but he did what they asked and bent over rolling his hips as he squatted down. He spun back to face them as he got back to his feet.

_When you gotta give me lovin' then you gotta give me some  
(You gotta give me lovin' and you gotta give me some)  
Come down_

Well, I can hear the (ring ring ring)  
The telephone goes ring (hello, hello)

There were more bills waving this time from patrons. Snake shrugged and made the best of his walk across the stage to have them tucked into the back pocket of his leather. The girl was a little free with her hand while doing it but he wasn't so worried.

_But we're still gettin' busy  
(Pom pom pom, hoo!) Now you're gettin' busy_

Snake flicked the catch on his gun belt as he all but slithered back to the center of the stage. The girls screamed again egging him on to take it all off.

_I can slow it down so you can pump it (pump it)  
Better move it fast so you can pump it (pump it)_

He stopped in a slightly spread legged stance and smiled. His guns were hanging loose now from his belt loops. Glancing up at the mirrors on the far wall even Plissken had to admit he looked pretty damned good up here.

_Two balls and a bat (hoo), a pitcher with a hat (ha)  
Slidin' into home base, tryin' to hit a home run_

The music and booze was getting to him. He was a show off at heart. His hands on his chest he slipped them down letting the thumbs trace the edge of his tattoo on the way down until the hooked on the edge of his pants. More screams of delight and he popped the button on his pants.

_Swing batta batta batta batta batta swing!_

He didn't touch the zipper. He didn't have to the weight of the guns slowly pulled it open. Snake rolled his hips grabbing the belt loops to pull them wide and expose the trail of auburn curls that mingled with the black line of the tattoo that still remained partially hidden.

Girls were all waving money now.

_(Bounce) Move it all around, (come on bounce) move it all around, bounce  
(Bounce) Pump it up and down, (come on bounce) bounce, bounce_

Snake was a bit overwhelmed but headed for one who had yet to give him a tip. She flushed as he walked toward her. Snake knew the ways of a striptease. He'd watched enough of them. He made eye contact and kept it with her as he swayed down to a spread legged squat. She was giggly as a school girl when she shoved the greenbacks into his open fly.

"Always knew you were into commando." Sam was next to her eying him up.

_Tell me do you like it? (Yeah, yeah)  
Do you want a little more? (Yeah, yeah)  
Now tell me do you love it? (Yeah, yeah)_

He was on his feet about to strut backwards when he saw someone getting rough with one of the girls. All bets and fun were off now. Snake pulled his revolver sending a flurry of bills to the stage. Everyone at the stage front thought he was playing like before. Gun up he took a shot that grazed the offenders shoulder. Right where Plissken wanted.

People were wide-eyed unsure of what to make of it. The guy was still up and threw the girl to the packed floor. Plissken was pissed now both because no one messed with his girls and his interrupted dare. He jumped from the stage shoving the gun in the still loose holster. He didn't care if his pants were open or not. The bastard swung at him and Snake dodged coming around hard with his forehead into the patron's temple.

He staggered from the blow and Snake had a hold of him. He was in no mood to drag the bastard and picked him up off the floor. He made a b-line for the front door and kicked it open. As soon as he saw the street he chucked the bastard into the road. Snake went in to check on the girl. Some of her coworkers had her up and she seemed only scared but uninjured.

"You better button these up." Sam slid in front of him and buttoned his pants. "… Before that snake gets loose."

Plissken's mood immediately improved. It was rather erotic to be up there with everyone watching.

"Shame you're on duty." She had that look to her that was one part flirt and all play.

"I eventually get off." He said it with all the sexual innuendo that comment could have.

"I bet you do."

Snake looked over the bar as it settled in again. "Every night if I can."

"Tonight?" She was playing him and he loved every second of it.

"Yes." Snake purred.

"Is that a fact." She mocked.

"Oh hmmm? That's a definite fact." Snake slid one of his tips in the bar for a drink.

"And who's the lucky girl?"

His drink was set down next to him. "Way I look at it, you owe me more than a drink for that dance."

Snake grinned and knocked back the shot.

"Thought I wasn't your type?" She had a curiosity to her expression.

"You also thought dancing wasn't my type sweetheart." Snake whispered it to her as he slid past her and into the crowd. He knew tonight was going to be a good night when he saw all the lurid smiles from his girls. It was damned good to be on duty here.

OOC: Italicized lyrics from "Come Baby Come" by K7 


End file.
